How about dealing with myself with no morality at all? Without judging a thought, a feeling, an emotion
or any movement arising in my being,
But just allowing myself to simply be with it
And see what it reveals.
A thought or an emotion appears in my being, Not one one would be proud of, Not labelled as politically correct, Nor positive, acceptable or luminous,
And perhaps even with a shade of guilt or shame.
A movement inspired by the seven deadly sins. It can be mild or raw, But not tolerable for the human I am, Violating all the rules.
Putting an ugly face To the image of a very evolved and good human being. Can I be simply with it? Looking at it in the eyes? Embracing the uncomfortable feeling Of guilt or shame
Appearing in my heart,
Tensing my eyes,
Constricting my lower abdomen,
Cutting me off from life energy.
Can I Relax? Looking at it. Not avoiding it.
Not hiding from it.
Not repressing it.
But taking a deep breath into it,
Giving it life
Instead of trying to ban it from my being?
This is, for me, being a Warrior
For liberation.
Going to the core of the movement.
Feeling and smelling Touching and seeing Fully feeling hate, guilt, resentment
And anything, Breathing within Giving it all space And even expanding it in my breath. Immersing myself entirely within,
Till I die.
A deep, full breath
Beyond any social or spiritual concepts,
A break from perpetual self-condemnation
No more torn between my humanity as it appears
And all that society impressed in my mind,
My sins are my greatest gifts to abolish duality and separation.
Under the law of morality,
I am duality. Living in the world,
Morality was one of my very first meals,
Directly Violating my intimacy with my own being.
Now I am reconquering the kingdom of my being
No more by banishing,
Condemning all that’s perceived as spawn of ego.
But by taking a bath with
the most excruciating slashes,
Cutting and lacerating my heart,
Oppressing my being,
Violating All that I heard
All that I learnt
To be again in touch with the core
My raw nature
The wild
The unconquerable
My essential being
All that I am.
No more judgement
No more avoidance
No more repression
No more alignment
But chaos,
The pure essence of life,
Creation and destruction at the same time.
The wildness of the unknown
Real intimacy.
No more trying to fix a movement
That is already perfect.
Who am I to fix anything?
Only a little mind filled with concepts and rules.
Now, The dance of life prevails
No rules here.
Light and shadows exist in the eye of the mind only.
In truth, no polarities, no white, no black, No good no bad But just what is.
The movement itself:
Anger is Hatred is Eagerness is Insecurity is Judgement is Desire is.
Resentment is.
Frustration is.
Shame is.
Guilt is.
Breathing into them,
Bathing in them,
Surrendering to them.
To welcome their essence To make peace To love To celebrate The end of the schism And The Mysterious infinite unknown of Life,
Finally, coming home,
Resurrected from my sins.
Bindu
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